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[sunshine_queen]

The joy I get out of writing this blurbs is immense, truly. And sad.

2.10- The Abduction
The Evil Chinese Dentist Strikes Back

There are some really, really long previouslies before we see the true sign of badassness: SpyMommy catching a fly. Syd talks fuzzily about seeing her mommy and daddy together to Will. Will commiserates. Syd laughs and throws a pillow at him. Will needs to take a test for some CIA thing. Francie is suspicious because as she has no real plot, no one needs to inform her of anything, so they shut up when she arrives. Syd guilts. Mommy gets some fresh air and Syd visits. They both looks ridiculously pretty. Mommy exposits. Mommy and Baby hug. Mommy and Baby get guns pointed at them. Syd mints the episode with her tears. Sark has breakable balls. In his mouth. Sloane ain't happy with his son. The nonboyfriend doesn't like the idea of his Syd going off with Sark. Cuvee is an ass. SpyDaddy snarls while Sark talks. Vaughn continues to help his fellow nonboyfriend. Syd likes his suit. Vaughn came a funeral. Whose? Alice's dad. Syd MFs about Alice. Fool. Marshall is cute and Sarkney is fun, even if Syd really hates him. Sark hearts Mommy like a mother, hint hint hint. Daddy comes to see Mommy about something or other. She's creepy, man, in her sexiness. She giggles about how they might still be married. Daddy is not amused. Mommy apologizes for being a heartless bitch. The Sarkney mission is so uncovert it's sad. Ariana Kane, also known as Bonnie, is the only woman in the Alliance. Bonnie and Daddy jibber about things. Yeah, Sloane doesn't understand either. The two nonboyfriends meet a Sports Bar and have a beer. Suddenly the CIA has forgotten about not employing those with a criminal record and has decided that they want Will. Will and Syd talk at a restaurant, lying to Francie is a gesture of love. Oh yes it is. Vaughn walks in with Alice. Syd literally chokes on her wine. Alice is bland as all, and Vaughn is developing an ulcer. Will saves the day. Marshall gets chosen to go on a mission. He flips. Vaughn wants to Marshallnap him after the mission. Syd cutely avoids talking about the bland one. Vaughn says the bland one thinks she's nice. Bonnie is scary. Marshall is nervous about flying. He tells Syd it's his job to keep her safe, which is, if you think about it, everyone's job. The mission is amusing. Marshall speaks Ewok. HOLY EFF IT'S THE EVIL CHINESE DENTIST! Marshall likes working for the good guys, not. Marshall gets napped. Francie gets a surprise party to Taryn Manning, who was the pregnant one in Britney's Crossroads. Bonnie thinks Daddy is bad bad bad. Daddy tries to make Mommy move far far away and, oh, by the by, we kinda sorta still are married. Mommy tells Daddy that she'll stop being a brat and only talk to Syd- she'll talk to him too now. She talks to Vaughn, the hell? Vaughn gets a phone call saying Marshall got napped but not by them. Well, who napped him? asks he of the forehead wrinkles. HOLY EFF IT'S THE EVIL CHINESE DENTIST!

2.11- A Higher Echelon
Ping.

Syd talks about the gov't really being Big Brother, ahhh. Syd doesn't talk to anyone for hours and hours and doesn't know that Marshall is napped. The ECD is mean to Marshall. Syd tells Francie about "Michael" and the audience says, Who? (She means Vaughn) He's smart and funny and cute- hot cute- and he's an exchange student and he's in my math class and GOM, Francie, squeal! Francie's like, and you wait why? Syd vaguely mentions the bland one and the bank not liking interoffice dating. Is that legal? Francie says maybe they're destined. I'm still wondering why no one's called Syd and been all, hey, Marshall was napped by the bad guys. Vaughn tells her. Sloane doesn't really care, bad Sloane! Mommy wants to bad things hidden behind good intentions, what else is new. The nonboyfriend promises Syd that they'll get Marshall.  ECD is mean to Marshall about his momma. Bonnie is mean to Daddy. Daddy tells Vaughn he needs to do things quickly to put Bonnie off his trail and brings up Syd to bring the point home. In Vietnam, Syd's got some crazy hair going. Dix and Syd work together. When they come home, triumphant (boo) Dix is sad about Marshall. Sloane fakes concern. Syd glares. Vaughn tells Syd that since a bunch of people died trying to save Marshall, Marshall is now on his own. Marshall fakes codes. Ping. Francie tells Will about Syd pining after Michael and Will takes it in stride. Ping. Will has a job. Ping. Will goes to beat Vaughn up 'cause he don't want no punk-ass boy with a hotrod messin' with his sister, capiche? Ping. Mommy does bad things in front of everyone. Ping. Everyone watches Mommy like she's going to turn around and turn them to ash with her eyes. Ping. Bonnie is scary and bothers Daddy. Ping. Marshall is a genius. PING. Irina likes her coffee black, ping. Bonnie wants Daddy's phone and tells him that he killed Haladki, obviously not realizing that this was a good thing. Ping. Daddy disappeared before Bonnie could kill him, yay! Ping. Dix is funny as a DJ and Syd is funny in her Sydney from the Block outfit, ping. Dix and Syd find Marshall as the ECD brings up the Echelon page which leads him to... ping pong. PING PING PING PING! Marshall loses it and nearly gets killed. Syd saves him, and then he saves her because of his paranoia. He quotes Luke SkyWalker and they jump from the 47th floor. Coincidence? I think not. They play the Weapon song and yay Marshall is back, ping. Syd guilts about bringing Marshall home to SD-6. Vaughn promises her things will end. Daddy is sitting in the dark, waiting for Sloane. He tells Sloane he needs his help against the evilness that is Bonnie. Sloane says okay, and Daddy leaves. And then Sloane calls Bonnie and tattles. Jerk.

2.12- The Getaway
The Date that Sex Forgot

Daddy goes to the movies and orders a huge bucket of artery-clogging popcorn as neither Mommy nor Syd is around to worry about his heart and stuff. He goes and sits down and starts chatting to the dude in front of him before he sees that he's like, way dead. Daddy tries to leave, but fighting ensues, which makes many innocent viewers evacuate. Daddy runs awaaaaaaay. Syd drives up and yells at him to get in the car, oh, in a lovely echo to ze pilot episode. Joy! Daddy said he didn't want to concern Syd with the petty annoyance that he might die soon 'cause of the Alliance. Syd snips that Dead Daddy concerns her. Daddy worries more about Dead Syd. Bad guys in cars chase them, Syd evades. At the Ops Center, Syd's hair bounces and shines as she talks more to Daddy. Daddy flashbacks to the SEXY BEAST and the Cracker Jack ring finger.  Daddy makes Syd go to work to appease Bonnie. Syd gets a giant bouquet of thank-you roses from Marshall. Syd whines to Vaughn about Sloane's faux patriotism. The nonboyfriend stupidly brings up helping her Daddy, hoping to score brownie points. The fool is soon shown to be wrong as the Bristow Forehead of Doom darkens and Syd snipes at him lying at her. She brings up every thing he's done wrong since EVER, and even brings up the bland one. Vaughn asks what her issue is really about- baby, she means nothing to me! Syd has none of it and stalks out, leaving Vaughn to wrinkle and wonder why he doesn't hand Syd a midol. Bitch. I do the Alias Dance. The camera circles Daddy a million times, making me nauseous. The Spy'Rents are cute. They want to protect Syd by protecting Daddy. Sloane tells Bonnie not to insult his nondaughter. Syd snits some more at Vaughn about making things easier. Vaughn sighs. Weiss is alive and wants some sugar! Vaughn watches miserably and snarfles. Dix dresses up like a priest in Nice and Syd has really purple hair. Weiss wants the dirt on what's up with the noncouple. Marshall makes a ring that slices through things. Syd sashays to No Doubt. The french security dude talks to Syd like my french teachers talk to me. Syd strips and gets what she wants, and no, not in that way. Weiss encourages and Syd comes back and Vaughn asks her out. Syd talks about death. Vaughn smiles at her winningly and says that he's really hungry. He does not mention the 'like the wolf' part. Syd agrees and both get squeey. She says she needs to change, and even Weiss is squeey. He wants éclairs. Some stupid lackey tells Bonnie that Syd's going out with someone. Vaughn speaks french, sigh. There is awkwardness. They order alcohol, whee! The Spy'Rents brainstorm over Chinese Food and water. Mommy ruins the end of the evening by bringing up her being not so good a wife. Syd asks why Vaughn is called 'Boy Scout'. Weiss irritates Vaughn so he takes him out of his ear. Bad guys start IDing Vaughn. More talk and wine. The nice owner dude says that they've both drank too much and they can't get to Avignon anymore, so they might as well stay the night and GOM there is a room key on the table. Both blush. Syd talks of issues, Vaughn talks of opportunities. Aaaah the UST is gorgeous. Syd can smell heart in Von's eyes and says YES. YES YES YES YES. Back with Weiss, Vaughn is in trouble, and they find out two seconds before the bad guys arrive, re: NO SEX. Syd and Vaughn run. They are very cute and in sync with one another and grab at each other when they get cornered and then turn. Vaughn kills the bad guys, yay! And they had called Bonnie and things are now bad. Syd is very shaken and saying they're stupid and bad. Vaughn takes full responsibility and gives her the car. He watches her leave. Dammit. No sex. Back at home, Weiss tells Vaughn not to be stupid and to lie, or Weiss will cover him, but telling Kendall about the date that sex forgot is a BAD MOVE. Weiss is funny. Vaughn says he can't be Syd's handler anymore. Weiss and Vaughn are like, BFFs. Daddy finds out that Bonnie was doing bad things with the dude Sloane killed to get into the Stepford Men's Association. Daddy is very upset he didn't figure it out and risks his life to save Syd's. Bonnie's lackeys get Daddy and bring him to the torture room. Bonnie looks thrilled and is anxious to meet Syd, right after Daddy spills the beans to her. Sloane comes in and nabs Bonnie. Yay! Daddy is saved! Daddy fills Mommy in and they both smile. Theirloveissomeanttobe. Syd and Vaughn meet in the basement of dreams and desire and talk about lying. He tells Syd they need to stay together. Syd gives him the thing she promised she wouldn't swap and yay they won. Theirloveissoright. Francie is annoying and stupid about blood sugar and asks about Michael from the Bank. Syd has my watch on and is stupid about it and says nothing will ever come of it, because she obviously hasn't read next week's script.  Francie takes her out for drinks. Vaughn is hot. Sloane gets a cool chip from this nerd he kills. Opera music starts and, teh gasp! We're on the beach in the Philippines with my SEXY BEAST in a white linen suit and a hut and GASP! EMILY! SHE LIVES! And all is well.

Comments

[dollsome.livejournal.com]

Fear not, because the joy I get out of reading these must at least match the joy you get out of writing them. And this might be a little bit sad, but does it look like I care? Hah! Not at all, not at all! *is a bad and rebellious soul*

THE EVIL CHINESE DENTIST is quite evil indeed. Poor Marshall. Torturing Marshall is just unnatural, wrong, and generally cruel.

It kills me every time I see 'SEXY BEAST.' Just so's you know. And, really, it's bizarre that some people just don't see it. ;-)

'The Date That Sex Forgot' is the best thing ever. Snicker. They should have honestly called the episode that. It would have been far more Deeply Intriguing.

I love Weiss. He is such a matchmaker.

Why are we calling . . . oooh, I get it now! I didn't even have to ask. We're calling Faye Dunaway Bonnie 'cause she played Bonnie in Bonnie & Clyde. I think. See? I'm wise. Really. Though it is slightly sad that I read the whole thing without figuring that out.

Er. Cough.

And just so's you know, everything that is said about SpyMommy and SpyDaddy makes me all insanely giddy. Which may say things about me along the lines of 'my goodness, girl, you are strange and pathetic' but I care NOT!

Because, well, again with the rebellious ways.

Mwahaha.

HA.

[sunshine-queen.livejournal.com]

I am so glad you enjoy them, dear.

ECD gave me nightmares, I swear. It was horrifying. But he brings with him a modicum of comfort, however, since he's been in every season. When he showed up in season 3 I was giddy. I was like, YES! ECD! I KNOW HIM! I KNOW HIM!

Sloane is a SEXY BEAST. He can't hide it.

Weiss should be in musicals. He looks like he'd have fun.

*applauds* Dude, props for getting why we called Faye Bonnie!

Because the Spy'Rents rock flippin' ON, Nitzers.

Love the icon, btw.

[thepodsquad.livejournal.com]

The Evil Chinese Dentist Strikes Back

He scares me more than anyone else on this show...EVER. There's something so friggin' scary about an insane dentist.

There are some really, really long previouslies before we see the true sign of badassness: SpyMommy catching a fly.

Rachel caught a fly by it's legs one time...should I be scared of her evilness?

Sark hearts Mommy like a mother, hint hint hint.

*covers ears and la las* That makes Sark really gross...considering his thing for Syd. :P He would so not wanna bang her if they were half-siblings. :P

She giggles about how they might still be married. Daddy is not amused. Mommy apologizes for being a heartless bitch.

I love that scene SO much. She's all "BSH-WEEE we might be married!" And SpyDaddy's all "No WAY!" And SpyMommy's all "Sorry dude, but we WAY are."

Ariana Kane, also known as Bonnie, is the only woman in the Alliance.

I STILL think SpyDaddy makes this face when she first looks at him. He's like "OH SPOOKY FACE! MY GOD! Face-lift much?"

Marshall speaks Ewok.

Best part of the whole episode.

Everyone watches Mommy like she's going to turn around and turn them to ash with her eyes.

Hey now...you never know. Maybe it's part of her Super Sexiness powers.

Irina likes her coffee black

The look she gives Vaughn is priceless.
Vaughn: Mrs. Robinson do you want cream? sugar?
SpyMommy: *looks that says "Do I LOOK like I want anything to weaken my coffee"*
Vaughn: *huffs* Fine. I'll be right back.

Syd has none of it and stalks out, leaving Vaughn to wrinkle and wonder why he doesn't hand Syd a midol. Bitch.

I still miss those days. She just got pissed about Alice...she didn't cry all. the. time. Someone take her Midol AWAY! Away with ye Midol, I want ye not.

Weiss is alive and wants some sugar!

And my SWeiss heart screams out for him to get said sugar. The cutie patootie.

The french security dude talks to Syd like my french teachers talk to me. Syd strips and gets what she wants, and no, not in that way.

I adore that scene. FakeBrooklyn!Syd is so weird. And that hair is SO ugly.

Syd can smell heart in Von's eyes and says YES. YES YES YES YES.

LMAO! And sydney tell truncatedness yes von YES! YES! YES! Unh. :P

Sloane and Emily were so cute together. They make me with much sadness.

[sunshine-queen.livejournal.com]

See above for my take on the ECD.

Rachel MUST be evil if she can do.

Dude, Sark would so still want to bang Syd even if she was his half-sister. You know it. She's his proclivity.

Dude, the 'we might still be married' scene was hysterical. SpyMommy was all, hee, the light dawns and we might still be married and SpyDaddy just looks at her like, this is not in anyway amusing, young lady. And SpyMommy's like, you're right, not funny.

Dude, Bonnie looks damn good for being really old. Plastic surgery is her friend.

I never said that the people were stupid for being afraid of SpyMommy... I mean, I'm afraid of SpyMommy and she's (A) an international woman of mystery that would have no interest in me whatsoever and (B) A FICTIONAL CHARACTER.

Vaughn is very happy Syd is fond of her coffee pale as milk. You know, 'cause he wants to kill Syd and all.

*sobs* Bitchy! Syd was so much funner than Crying! Syd, agreed.

Ew, Sweiss.

FakeBrooklyn! Syd was funny and obnoxious. "Ey! It's not a date!"

I wish I could remember more quotes from that fic. I remember something about a waterfall, but nothing was better than the smelling heart in his eyes.

*sigh* The Sloanes were fun.