D'oh!

[sunshine_queen]

Okay. I am SO GLAD I was spoiler free.

 

Ha, a 48 hours earlier thing! yay, Alias tricks!

So, Vaughn shot Dixon. he has a vest. He'll live.

Yay, Sloane gives Vaughn 48 hours to get whatever is in his system out of it- conveniently where we began! Yay!

Syd is sad that Vaughn hasn't contacted her. :-(

Vaughn is in France. He barely speaks french, though. Double :-(.

Syd gets upset, and so Syd scrubs. Elektra did the same thing. Anyone else make the connection? WHAT IS HER HAIR DOING?

Nadia is the prettiest little girl in the world. She totally is.

She! Visits! Auntie! Kay! Nadia, i ADORE you! She even gets her chocolates! Nadia, ROCK ON.

So, Vaughn talks to Son of Shaft's employer, Mr. Deep Throat. Vaughn's all, this is crap, I'm sick of being rogue, I miss my girlfriend, etc. Mr. DT is all, quit whining, pussy, and pony up. Vaughn's all, die. DT's all, check under the table.

Under the table are pics of Papa Vaughn listening to an iPod. he looks remarkably french.

 

Marshall tests Daddy's radiation through his fingerprints.

Daddy and Sloane meet up, 'cause Dixon's doing something with RAMBALDI! Ah, glorious name! Sloane was all but salivating.

Nadia goes to visit Katya, bringing her expensive chocolate. Katya tells a long story about what a badass Irina was as a kid. It ends up that Katya is fucking DEATHLY ALLERGIC TO CHOCOLATE, so she winds up in the hospital.

Dixon has tix to some game or another that he can't make, so he offers 'em to Syd. Syd's boyfriend is MIA. She can't go. His son is 12 and has a date. I'm doomed.

Nadia and Syd chat about Katya, manipulation, Irina, and Irina "putting a hit" on Syd. Nadia wants a Mama, Katya can give her tidbits. Syd is all, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT. IRINA SUCKS. I gasp at her blasphemy. Nadia wants a mama badly.

Vaughn joins a bad crew with a hot girl. Vaughn speaks french. They steal things and kill people. The lighting is painful on the eyes. The chick hits on Vaughn. My baby is a good boy. HE IS.

Dammit.

wow, a lot happened.

 

 

So, Syd goes to see Auntie Kay, snarks at her about trying to kill her. Isa Rossellini is FREAKING ME OUT with her voice and face because she sounds JUST LIKE HER MOTHER.

Anyway, Auntie Kay wants Syd to know that Irina was set up and didn't try to kill her 'cause she loved her and would be HEARTBROKEN that Syd had abandoned her so quickly without answers. To prove her case, she asks for a tape Irina sent to Auntie Kay before she died. She is also trying to kill Syd with guilt.

The hot chick tries to seduce Vaughn, and for a heart-stopping moment, I doubted my baby. BUT HE PULLED THROUGH! HE PULLED THROUGH UNSCATHED.

Now it turns ou- Surprise!- they're attacking the Rambo car of Dixon. Vaughn's like, oh, hell. Fucking Rambaldi. He goes to yell at Son of Shaft, who is generally nasty. I'm a bad guy, he says, and guess what? "[Papa Vaughn] is too." And then enumerates how bad PV is. Man, whatever.

The blood of Daddy, or whatever, that Marshall sent down to the lab comes back. Grand-scale mutation. FUCK.

 

 

Okay. Nadia goes to talk to Sloane. Poor kid. She has the most corrupt, evil gene pool EVER.  She gets all pretty and dewey eyed.

Syd goes to a store with a BEAUTIFUL coat on. She gives the code 11-14-02 and gets a music box. Really scary thing? It's playing Brahm's "Hungarian Dances" . Either that or Mozart's "Turkish march." One of the two, because I can't remember which one's which right now. They're both SpyMommy songs. The one of the two songs I have ALWAYS associated with SpyMommy. I nearly had a heart attack.

Vaughn calls Syd and says nothing. It's cute.

Anyway, Vaughn details a mission to the bad guys. One caveat, no shooting, 'cause the CIA don't shoot unless shooted upon. Re: don't case trouble. The baddies agree.

Syd's at home, playing with her musicbox. nadia comes in wearing a distracting shirt. she talks to syd about wanting her parents not to be all bad. I say if Sloane's not all bad, Irina's fandamntastic.

She goes out with Eric. ("Heric") Syd plays with the music box, noticing BRIGHT RED NUMBERS flashing on her chest as it plays. She writes them down, and goes to work to find the clip Auntie Kay asked for.

It came from Sloane.

FUCK HE SET MOMMY UP!

OH MY GOD! Why does this not shock me?

Bastard.

 

 

Okay, mission. Blah blah, boringness, until the wind up where we started. One of the baddies shoot at the CIA. Idiot.

Dixon chases Vaughn and the chick. Chick drops. Same as the beginning. Dixon doesn't see Vaughn. Repeat: he does not see Vaughn. (shut up, tess.)

Vaughn runs out to Son of Shaft, who is impressed. Vaughn beats him up 'cause PV IS NOT A TRAITOR! TELL HIM THE TRUTH!

The truth: Irina killed PV. Everything's been a lie all along. The diaries, the everything. A lie.

Son of Shaft works for Sloane.

FUCKING A! SLOANE'S A BAD GUY!

Uh. Big shock, here.

I am just glad it wasn't Daddy.

 

Okay. So. Um.

Syd goes to see Katya. She knows, but makes her promise not to tell Nadia. Says that Sloane did it. DIE SLOANE DIE!

Daddy gets told by Marshall he could die. He doesn't care. marshall's all, THINK ABOUT SYD! Sloane, of course, is standing there. Daddy reassures him everything is good, and Vaughn is home. I'm all, Sloane? I don't like you so much.

Vaughn comes home. They're all cute and huggy. Vaughn's like, my Daddy is dead. :-( And then he's all, Sloane did it, Syd. And I'ma kill him.

Syd's like, oh, baby. Take a number and come inside for the greatest story ever told.

We go to Santiago. I'm all, Chile? Why are we in Chile? A minion's all, FUCK! Then he goes off, calling, Mr. Sloane? Mr. Sloane?

Me: The hell? How is Sloane in Santiago? Sloane is in Los Angeles- oh. Oh, hell. Oh, mother of god. MOTHER OF GOD, JOEL GREY.

And yes. The other Mr. Sloane, that I managed to TOTALLY SPACE ON? He's there. He set it all up. Oh, hell.

SLOANE I LOVE YOU BABY!

Next week: Daddy, Syd and Vaughn play straws to see who gets to kill Sloane. Daddy wins. He actually says "Give me one good reason not to kill you like I killed my wife."

A- His wife! His wife! Irina! YAY!
B- Irina's not dead. It's okay.

 

 

 

Comments

[thepodsquad.livejournal.com]

This was like...whoa. My thought on the preview was actually, "Fuuuuuuuuuck". And also? Daddy did not kill Mommy. He didn't. Because she explained about Arvin, and the only reason Daddy works with Arvin now is so he can slowly plot his slow and painful death by torture...or inhalation of small doses of anthrax, or something like that! Because Daddy loves Mommy for ever and ever and ever and a day.

And I am so hyper.

so I should shut up.

[sunshine-queen.livejournal.com]

Man. He loves Mommy FOREVER AND A DAY. There's so no way she's dead. None. NONE.

I'm hyper, too!

[dollsome.livejournal.com]

That was seriously, like, the best last one minute of Alias ever. Because first, we get Uncle Joel (This. Is. Going. To. Rock. So. Much.) and then THE BEST PROMO THERE EVER WAS AND EVER WILL BE. This promo owns my heart and soul. I give my heart and soul willingly to this promo.

He looooves her forever and a day and ohhhh, Sloane is screwed.